Ethiopia- Days 5 and 6

The last two days were spent just hanging out at the HH. On Wednesdsay we had to check out of the hotel, so we spent the day at the HH and went out for lunch. At lunch Kevin and our new friend Victor, took a picture of our vaccine banner. The place where we got all of our shots is trying to get pictures of their banner all over the world. So it came to Ethiopia with us. We now get free vaccines for a year. When we got to the HH on Wednesday a lot of the kids, including Jonah, had been taken to get their vaccines. So when we pulled in we saw all the babies outside laying on the floor. Yonas stayed and hung for a awhile. Everyone at the HH loves the kids.

You can see in the picture there is one really sick child. He is 1 1/2 years old. He looks like a 2 month old. He has heart failure. If he were adopted when he first came to the HH, he would have been fine. He needed surgery and now it may be too late. A US doctor was going to be coming in the next few weeks and was going to see if they could get him back to the US to do surgery. At this point, he may be too weak to go through surgery. They take such good care of him and love on him just like all the other kids. Ethiopia does not have good hospitals and no one can afford the surgery. Hopefully they can get him some help.

Mulat came at 7:30pm to get us to the airport. We had a 10:30pm flight home. We said good bye to Jonah and left. The plane ride home was long and uneventful. We got back here at 8:30am. Estelle picked us up from the airport. We came home, got JT from school and went to Ruby Tuesdays for a much needed salad. We were not allowed any fruit or salad on the trip. JT seemed surprised to see us. We told him all about Jonah. He even tried on his new Ethiopian clothing.

We had a great trip. We just got a call yesterday from Wide Horizons saying we should expect to be back in the middle of August.

Jonah turned one on July 19th. We had pizza and cake in his honor. We can't wait to get him home!

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Ethiopia- Day 4/ Court Day

Day 4 was Court Day. You don't always pass court. We were told that the birth parents had all been to court a few weeks earlier. We knew Jonah's mother had shown up and relinquished her rights to us. But, if one little piece of paper is missing or not signed, you don't pass and then you wait again.

Mulat picked us all up. We were not allowed to have cameras so we have no pictures. We were told we could be in court all day. There were 10 families that had to go through. We saw a few couples from another agency sitting in the waiting room. They told us some of the questions the judge asked. When the first family was called in, they came out 3 minutes later. That was it. 3-5 questions and they were done. So then they called Yonas Ararso and in we went. She asked us the questions and that was it. We were officially his parents. The questions.... Why did you want to adopt from Ethiopia? How will you deal with a mixed raced family? Have you met Yonas? Do you understand that this is irreversible? That was it, we were parents of two little boys.

It took 45 minutes for all of the families to get through. We were amazed. Mulat took us all back to the hotel. A group us wanted to do some more shopping. Mulat came with us and took us to a "mall" and then we went for lunch. Then back to the HH for the evening. We spent time with Jonah and Kevin enjoyed playing some soccer with the guard.

Ethiopia- Day 3

Mulat picked us all up in the morning to do some shopping. He took us to one street and we had 1 hour to shop. We had to bargain for everything, which I wasn't very good at. The prices are so cheap I didn't really mind paying the first price they told me. But we did get the price down from where they started so we did well. We also got our shoes shined by two little boys. Our tennis shoes mind you. They kept saying, "No problem" when Kevin tried to explain that you don't shine tennis shoes. But we got the shoes shined and had some wet socks to prove it! They wanted to charge us 10 birr each, which is less than 1 dollar. (13 birr= $1) After he shined the shoes he wanted 20 birr each. So Kevin just handed him 6 US dollars and the kid looked like he just went to heaven.

Our shoe shiners.

After we went shopping Mulat drove us through the Merkato, the big market. He said we can't shop there because it's too crowded and there is a lot of pickpocketing that goes on there. We went on a Sunday which was a "slow" day and it was packed. They sold everything there. I really liked the chickens. People would buy them and carry them by the feet while they were still alive.

We then headed to a coffee shop. I only bought one bag but I did buy a toothbrush from a boy in front of the store. It is made of wood and I guess once you start to chew on it, bristles form and then you brush/pick your teeth with it.

After shopping we headed back to the hotel for lunch.

Notice the goats walking head on into the traffic.

Then we went to the HH for the evening.

One of the guards at the HH. He also make scarves.

Ethiopia- Day 2

We didn't do much on day 2. We went to HH in the morning up until nap time. We headed back to the hotel and ate lunch with 2 others couples and did some shopping there. We headed back to HH around 4 pm and stayed until the kids went to bed. Kevin taught a boy how to juggle. He was being adopted from a family that was there in the group before us. Here are some pictures......

Outside the HH. These kids were doing something with corn.

Ethiopia-Day 1

We survived the 15 hour flight over. We didn't sleep much at all and arrived in Addis at 8 in the morning. We got the hotel (which is very nice and just like any other American four/five star hotel) at about 9:30am. As we walked into our room the phone was ringing. I answered it and it was Mulat who is the Horizon House driver, he said he was

in the lobby. I told Kevin that I guess he just wanted to introduce himself to us. So, we dropped our luggage and headed downstairs. We were greeted by Katie and Reed who are from Florida and met Mulat. Then he said, "Ok, let's go." Kevin and I looked at Katie and asked what as going on. We soon found out that he was there to take us to the orphanage. After not sleeping 24 hours and just stepping foot into the hotel room, Kevin and I just looked at each other and laughed. So we got into a van filled with some other families. Some from Chicago, California and Minnesota. Off to Horizon House we went. (There are 10 families on the trip with us)

Driving- I can not even describe the driving. It is just best to close your eyes and not look. I have seen 1 stop light in the last 2 days we've been here and one time it wasn't even working. People are walking in the street along with the goats, donkeys, dogs and we saw one cow. The drivers just weave in and out and surprisingly we have not hit one living thing. It's just nuts.

Horizon House- Driving down an alley and 2 honks later, a gate is opened by a guard and there we were. There are two rooms. One for the younger babies and the other for the 1-2 year olds. We went in and I looked around at 6 cribs. Couldn't seem to find Jonah. Then the nanny pointed him out. I didn't even recognize him. He just came to Horizon House five days ago and they had cut off all his curls before he got there. So, we see a huge brown eyed child staring at us ,just smiling. Just like in his picture. He just sat and smiled and we picked him up. We spent about 2 hours there, just hanging out with Jonah and all the other babies. We fed him lunch, which he devoured, and then they all went down for nap. They are on a tight schedule. I love it!

We went back to the hotel to take a nap and then headed back to the HH (Horizon House) for the evening. They had just gotten a bath and Jonah smelled delicious. He has a runny nose and a few other minor issues that will be taken care of now that he is at HH. As the head nurse told us, "He's with us now, don't worry. We take good care of him." The nurse and nannies love Jonah and all the babies for that matter. The babies seem so happy and are smiling and love the nannies as well. The place is very clean and well cared for. After dinner, which he again devoured they all get ready for bed. Love the schedule! We said goodnight and put him to bed.

Restaurant- We went to an Ethiopian restaurant with 2 other couples. Everyone is great but we seem to be hanging out a lot with Katie and Reed from Florida and Robyn and Don from Minnesota. Again, down an alley way and the doors open to a really nice open restaurant. We ate, or should I say ordered ( I ate nothing!) Ethiopian food. I didn't like it all but. But they had singers and traditional dancing for 2 hours and it was great. We then headed back to the hotel for some much needed sleep.

Ethiopia- Lets just say that whatever you think it looks like, it is probably 100 times worse. Everything is run down and everything seems like it could collapse in about 2 seconds. We are not allowed to walk around without either of our 2 drivers, Yonas and Mulat or with the guard from HH. There is a bad perception here from Americans coming to adopt "their " children and slave trading and selling babies. Obviously that is not happening with most of us but it does happen and for our safety they want us with someone who can speak the language. Every single person we have met has been very nice. Yonas our driver is the best and has been taking us back and forth everywhere.

That's all for day 1. More to come.....

Ethiopia Bound

Ethiopia, here we come......

We found out a few days ago that our court date could be July 12 but to not make any arrangements because some paper work was missing and we would not know for sure until the end of the week. That leaves us with less than 1 week to plan. So we found out today that we are confirmed and ready to go. We will leave next Thursday the 8th and return the following Thursday. Well, we will leave Ethiopia on Wednesday and be back home Thursday. Because of such short notice there are no tickets on Ethiopian Airlines. They have a direct flight that stops in Rome to refuel. Good and bad. You don't get to get off the plane but you get to Ethiopia faster. So kevin has until 4:00pm today to make arrangements with a travel agency to get us to Germany then to Ethiopia. Needless to say, this is not enough time to really get ready but we have no choice. We have all of our paperwork ready to go and need to get one thing notarized. We are pros at that!

I told JT today that we are going to see Jonah and that he will be staying with Bubbe Stell and Grandpa Al. He didn't have much to say. But he will love being with them and will have a great time. We will give him a present to open each night when we are gone. Just some little things I have been saving up for him.

We will get to see Jonah next Saturday. We will be able to hang out with him and take photos. By Monday the 12th, if all goes well, he will be officially ours and a US citizen and pictures can be posted.

More to come.......

Happy Belated Birthday/Poked and Prodded

We are bad parents! We got so caught up with this adoption, we forgot to blog about JT's third birthday. His birthday was May 11th. We had his party on May 8th. I had planned on putting pools in the yard, as we have done the last 2 years and just having the kids play in them all day. Well, it was so windy that day, I couldn't even decorate the tables. It was sort of warm but so so windy. Of course the kids didn't care. I had found a turtle about an hour before the party, so he joined in the fun. I gave little "reptile show" and taught the kids about reptiles and turtles, then we let him go in the woods. We played Pin The Tail On The Donkey, which they really liked. Overall, they really enjoyed just kicking the balls in the yard.

We always celebrate with a Carvel cake. It has been a tradition in my family for over 25 years. JT loves them as well. We sang Happy Birthday and JT ended the song with a lot of clapping and saying he wanted us to sing more. So we did, about 10 times more! And that continued for several days after party as well. He would get out the candles, tell us to light them and wanted us to sing to him.

JT had a great time with his family and friends. He thanks them all for coming.

On the adoption front....

I went today and got 4 shots for our upcoming travels. My arms are both a little sore. Kevin goes tomorrow and we both go next Monday for Yellow Fever. Kevin went to the Ethiopian Embassy today to apply for our Visa's. He picks them up tomorrow. Kevin spoke to the social worker and she said to most likely plan on a July travel date but it could possibly be June! When I heard that I said, "But it's June now!" We were told we will get 2-3 weeks notice. So we just continue to wait for that phone call. We have gotten really good at this waiting thing! That's all for now.

We Got "The Call"

It only took 2 years, 3 months and a few days!

Thursday night was a night we never want to relive. We are suppose to be in Rochester, NY right now, but with some mishaps due to United workers who can't do their job, we never made it. Yesterday (Friday) I was exhausted. Our neighbor Lisa was home from work and we went out to do some some shopping. On our way home, as Kevin and JT were sleeping, my cell phone rang. It only rang once and I missed the call. I decided to call back for some reason. I don't usually do that. It was Wide Horizons! Erin (our social worker answered and I didn't even let her talk. I just said, "So, did we get our referral?" She said, "Congratulations, you have a boy!" So she told me that we have a 10 month old son whose birthday is July 19. She gave us his family background (of what information she had, which is not much) And she told me about what paper work she was going to send us. Meanwhile Lisa is trying to figure out what is going on. I called Nicole and told her to meet us for dinner. (I was very nonchalant)

When Lisa and I got home we went right to the computer, pulled up the pictures and printed out all the papers. Kevin who just woke up came tumbling down the stairs and all I said was, "We got our kid!" He looked surprised and took the pictures. He said he couldn't believe how healthy he looked. He had the perception that he would look like those emaciated kids you see on TV asking for donations. There were no tears in usually Erin fashion.

I called my cousin Andrea. I tried to call my sister but she wouldn't answer. We met Nicole and her family for dinner and showed them the packet we received. Later that night my sister and both our parents got to see pictures. We can email pictures but they can not be on the Internet.

We have a doctors appointment on Monday to look over all the medical reports and information. If everything looks good, we send in our acceptance letter, a big check and then we wait for a court date. We should be traveling sometime in July for the first trip. If we can get there in July for our court date, then we can go get him in August/September. If we can not get a court date in July, the courts close for 2 months for the rainy season and then we would have to wait until October. Well, I refuse to let that happen! Last year anyone who got a referral before June, traveled before the courts closed.

We told JT he had a brother. He said, "No." We told him the baby will sleep in the baby's room. He said, "NO." Needless to say we were off to a great start! Before bed we showed him the picture again and he said, "Brother." I told him again he would sleep in the baby's room and JT got out of his bed, took the picture and put it in the crib!

Once we accept the referral, will give you his name! That's all for now!

A Helping Hand

Many people who adopt get financial help through their church or ask for donations. We would never ask for donations to help pay for our adoption. After reading numerous blogs and seeing what others have done, we decided we could provide our child's orphanage with a monetary gift. That is really what they need.

It's customary for adopting parents to provide the orphanage with a gift. When we go on our two trips, we will be bringing with us many items that the orphanage is in high need of. We would also love to provide them with a monetary donation.

$5 to us is nothing. But to someone living in Ethiopia this means a new life. People there live off of less than $1 a day. It only costs $17 to vaccinate a single child against six major diseases: polio, diphtheria, whooping cough, tetanus, tuberculosis and measles. $5 would buy a child a new pair of shoes, a uniform for school, grain for a whole family or medicine for a child. The best schools cost ($50) per month. To go to a normal school instead costs about ($5) per month. 89% of Ethiopia does not have clean drinking water. There is fresh water underground in most of the villages. They need money to help build wells. $75 provides safe water, sanitation, and hygiene education for one child in Ethiopia for life.

So, as you can see $5 can go a long way in Ethiopia. We would like for all of our friends and family to help out our child's (to be) country.

If you would like to join in, we have created a donation button at the top of the page. Please donate as little or as much as you can. Please click on the button at the top of the page to complete the transaction. You're welcome to use your own PayPal account for funding or a credit card.

Thanks for your support!

Still Waiting- "Yes, We Still Want A Boy"

We have been very frustrated with how long we have been waiting. The time frame given to us was 12-18 months. We are now going on 19 months. After reading so many other blogs from other people who are with other agencies, we have been seeing people get referrals who have been waiting much less time than us. Below is a letter from us to our social worker (whose name is also Erin) from our agency. It answered a lot of questions for us. We are still annoyed but at least we understand how everything works. So here are the answers to not just some of our questions but to those who keep asking us what is going on. Our letter is in black and she responded to each section which is in blue.

Erin,

We listened to the recorded message tonight and hope you can answer a question for us regarding the wait time for a referral.

This is similar to a question Erin posed in an email recently but I need to get a better understanding. We have friends who have adopted from other countries, so we know how some countries government's handle referrals. According to them, in China, for example, no matter what agency you are with they know the "log in" date of the dossier and whomever is next in line gets the referral. It doesn't matter who they used as an agency.

When we have a log in date that was almost one year before someone else and they already have a referral (for the same request) can we then assume Ethiopia doesn't do it this way? Yes, Ethiopia doesn't work this way at all. Adoption agencies generally work with several orphanages in Ethiopia. Orphanages in turn partner with many U.S. agencies as well as European agencies. Each adoption agency has their own process, wait list, etc. In countries like China everything is very regulated- Ethiopia works in a very different way.

Wide Horizons is a big agency and has a large Ethiopian program. Because of that, is that why we are waiting so much longer than other agencies who don't have a as many people waiting? Yes, that is probably part of the reason. Our wait times fluctuate throughout families process a bit- I know that right now you are waiting on the extreme long end of our time-frame. If there are more families on our wait list for a specific request- that time frame is the longest-because simply there are just more families waiting.

Is it safe to say that if you choose an agency who is smaller and have less people waiting you will get a faster referral? (Of course, that doesn't make a whole lot of sense.) It may. If another agency has only a handful of people requesting an infant boy- than it does mean you are likely to wait less time on their list than ours. Each agency has different wait times. Some may be smaller agencies (meaning have a smaller program with less families waiting) and some may be new to working with Ethiopia- and after 6/7 years of experience (like WHFC) their programs are likely to grow.

If that is the case, why is the government choosing their agency to give the referral to and not Wide Horizons? We had our dossier completed almost a year before some other people we're following on blogs. These other agencies are also well known and well accredited, so that is not an issue. But the fact is they are receiving referrals after 9-10 months and yet we are going on 19 months and still no word. The government is not choosing to give the referral to the other agency- the referrals come from the orphanages. We are currently working with 3 orphanages and Dr. Tsegaye is always working to find other orphanages for WHFC to partner with. Of course ethical concerns and agreements of how we work and what we expect as far as care of children, communication, etc. have to be addressed before we partner with an orphanage.

We are alright with waiting if that is how long it takes for everyone but obviously that is not the case if we have been waiting almost double the time than others who have received referrals. We know how great the agency is, but again we would like to know what the process is for the government when they are giving referrals to agencies and why some are chosen over others. Again, I understand your frustration but the referrals are not being given by the government. I am sure as you researched agencies to work with you found that some had different wait times projected for how long you are likely to wait until referral based on your request. Agencies don't have control over how long the wait may get for families, and the wait times tend to fluctuate during a family's process. For instance, another large, reputable agency is no longer accepting applications for infants because their wait exceeded 2 years for a referral.

I know this has been a very long process for your family, and that you have waited a very long time for a referral! I am sorry that you are one of the first families to experience waiting longer than 18 mos. You are very close to getting a referral! Do you want to consider opening up your request to either gender? I only say this because if the next few infants that are matched with WHFC are infant girls- you will be skipped over on the list- because your request is for a boy 0-12 mos. Of course you may feel very strongly that you would like a boy- and that's ok too! Please let me know if you would like to talk about this further.

Best,

Erin

Thank you for your time.

Kevin and Erin


We did respond to her and told her that yes, we still want our boy! So, we continue to wait. We should be getting some good news very soon. ( We feel like we have been saying that for a long time) Hopefully the next time we write we will be telling everyone we have a referral!